What is behind a face, what is the thought behind an ordinary face in an ordinary day… do we stop as long as we should to something out of the ordinary? Can we ever know the battles that go on inside a man's mind.. do we really reside on the other end of the fence, or do we just don't stop enough to listen, to care… to ask, really ask - is everything okay?
Swept away into the ocean
Pulled away from shore
Feeling the strains against me
I take a deep breath and put on a smile
The person you greet, that which you see
A man of ordinary fates and a normal story
You walk past me casually for I can't surprise you
I move with the ease of the troubled
Who has gone too far to even try
I have the calm of the resignation
That decides to no longer fight
The inner turbulence inside.
I close my eyes and I am taken away
The waves loom larger and I can barely gasp
Water fills my lungs, my chest tightens
A constant nudge and I am suddenly awake
To your questions and little nuisances
Is my quiet demeanor an irritation to you?
Half hearted concern, the shifting of your eyes
I'm not the sort of man with who you spend time
I'm the quiet one who keeps to himself
Laughs appropriately and won't understand.
I have eyes neither beautiful nor too deep
I don't have have charm nor the right words to speak
I move with the crowd for I don't know how else
To keep myself breathing and my eyes wide open
For all it takes is just one moment to myself
And I am swept away in the ocean
Roughly pulled away from shore
Battling with shreds of hope
Fighting hard the inner turbulence
To which you're blind.
- RKS
Sunday, June 29, 2014
How Do I…
Day 293
How do I make you see what you mean to me
That without you I am alone and empty
What words can tell you how I feel
How do I make this emotion seem real?
How do I tell you that you're my breath
You're my heart, you're my hope, my faith
How do i keep myself away from you
How do we hold on, when we're so far away
Turning away, where do I go, where to?
Would you just trust me
With you is where I want to be
The reins of life have trapped me
There is nothing but darkness where I see
But you're my breath, you're my heart
You are...you're my shadow, I ache apart
Will you listen to my silences
And know how hard this feeling beats
Would you remember my quiet promises
Or will they get stolen in the waves of time
Washed in rains, tears you won't know belong to me
The words I spoke, the moments we shared
How do I tell you, what you mean to me...
That without you, every day is cold and empty
Will you know if I didn't say
Would you find me, if I walked away?
-RKS
That without you I am alone and empty
What words can tell you how I feel
How do I make this emotion seem real?
How do I tell you that you're my breath
You're my heart, you're my hope, my faith
How do i keep myself away from you
How do we hold on, when we're so far away
Turning away, where do I go, where to?
Would you just trust me
With you is where I want to be
The reins of life have trapped me
There is nothing but darkness where I see
But you're my breath, you're my heart
You are...you're my shadow, I ache apart
Will you listen to my silences
And know how hard this feeling beats
Would you remember my quiet promises
Or will they get stolen in the waves of time
Washed in rains, tears you won't know belong to me
The words I spoke, the moments we shared
How do I tell you, what you mean to me...
That without you, every day is cold and empty
Will you know if I didn't say
Would you find me, if I walked away?
-RKS
Sunday, June 15, 2014
Human Form
Day 292
The state of our emotions, at times when it reaches its peaks, is best expressed without words. Sometimes even the slightest stirs in our souls can be shown in soft movements, slow breathing. Taking a feeling that lives within us and describing it with our physical beings. Sometimes I think the human form cannot look more beautiful than it does when in dance.
I often write about dancing - I think it is a poetry of the body. Recently I was at a show where I didn't really know the storyline, there was no narration. But there was music, and song in a language I didn't understand. Yet there was dance, and suddenly it was right there. The mood of the actor being spread to you. Energy showing passion, showing curiosity, discovering love… being torn away from the one you love. The desperation - to utter despair. Is it really the dance move that conveys the emotion? Or is the emotion which fuels the movement. What is it that we connect to?
The eyes of the actor are transparent - it is a strange thought. As actors, a mask is being put on, it is not who they truly are. They are now in the role of someone else, we know that - they know that… and yet for them to convey feeling to us, they must act without any walls, without any masks… they need to engage an emotion and fit into this pretend role… to convince the audience in front of you to play along. To weave a story which will take you to a place that doesn't exist, a tale we don't know.. and yet sometimes, it happens…and we're lost. Our mind sometimes seems so quick to adapt to the make believe world. Not just in thought, but in reaction. Why else do movies make us laugh, or cry? Why does a show stop your heart, why do you feel the anticipation build up? We know it's not real…
Human form… in all its fault and its imperfections, when in motion, when in dance… when raw in emotion is breath taking. We are perfect and simple… we're uncomplicated, and we're encompassed in just one emotion - in just that one moment. We're not complicating it by trying to add in what we must do, and what we mustn't, who we should be around who… actors engage one emotion, and they find its depth and they speak it loudest..when they speak with no words. It makes me think sometimes who is really on a stage, who is playing a role, who is pretending… the actor on the stage who accepts and displays their feelings, open and raw for all to see, or the audience who wears the mask of etiquette, whose faces we all look at and try to read, to understand?
I often write about dancing - I think it is a poetry of the body. Recently I was at a show where I didn't really know the storyline, there was no narration. But there was music, and song in a language I didn't understand. Yet there was dance, and suddenly it was right there. The mood of the actor being spread to you. Energy showing passion, showing curiosity, discovering love… being torn away from the one you love. The desperation - to utter despair. Is it really the dance move that conveys the emotion? Or is the emotion which fuels the movement. What is it that we connect to?
The eyes of the actor are transparent - it is a strange thought. As actors, a mask is being put on, it is not who they truly are. They are now in the role of someone else, we know that - they know that… and yet for them to convey feeling to us, they must act without any walls, without any masks… they need to engage an emotion and fit into this pretend role… to convince the audience in front of you to play along. To weave a story which will take you to a place that doesn't exist, a tale we don't know.. and yet sometimes, it happens…and we're lost. Our mind sometimes seems so quick to adapt to the make believe world. Not just in thought, but in reaction. Why else do movies make us laugh, or cry? Why does a show stop your heart, why do you feel the anticipation build up? We know it's not real…
Human form… in all its fault and its imperfections, when in motion, when in dance… when raw in emotion is breath taking. We are perfect and simple… we're uncomplicated, and we're encompassed in just one emotion - in just that one moment. We're not complicating it by trying to add in what we must do, and what we mustn't, who we should be around who… actors engage one emotion, and they find its depth and they speak it loudest..when they speak with no words. It makes me think sometimes who is really on a stage, who is playing a role, who is pretending… the actor on the stage who accepts and displays their feelings, open and raw for all to see, or the audience who wears the mask of etiquette, whose faces we all look at and try to read, to understand?
Sunday, June 8, 2014
I'm Okay
Day 291
Whats behind those beautiful eyes
They speak louder than your sweet lies
Your lips slightly quiver when I ask
Will they say what's behind this mask?
But they simply whisper "I am okay"
The slight tremble in your hands
Distracting you from your confident stance
You try too hard to be at ease.
Your eyes dart around the place
When they feel they aren't being watched
As though they are looking for a ground to claim
A piece of land they can say is theirs
Somewhere you feel safe...
And I ask with no words
As you will answer with none
Your silhouette still as you think
For just a moment you're there
For just a moment, your guard is down
Then a quick smile, a hurried blink..
And I am met again with those eyes
That talk louder than your soft smile
That echo the resignation of loneliness
The kind which no longer tries to speak
Which is so strong now, they feel weak
You question the dark within you
You drown in your fear, you search for acceptance
So many thoughts which I will never know
So many feelings you will never say...
For whenever I ask...
Your small hands reach out to reassure me
As your lips softly form the words "I am okay".
- RKS
They speak louder than your sweet lies
Your lips slightly quiver when I ask
Will they say what's behind this mask?
But they simply whisper "I am okay"
The slight tremble in your hands
Distracting you from your confident stance
You try too hard to be at ease.
Your eyes dart around the place
When they feel they aren't being watched
As though they are looking for a ground to claim
A piece of land they can say is theirs
Somewhere you feel safe...
And I ask with no words
As you will answer with none
Your silhouette still as you think
For just a moment you're there
For just a moment, your guard is down
Then a quick smile, a hurried blink..
And I am met again with those eyes
That talk louder than your soft smile
That echo the resignation of loneliness
The kind which no longer tries to speak
Which is so strong now, they feel weak
You question the dark within you
You drown in your fear, you search for acceptance
So many thoughts which I will never know
So many feelings you will never say...
For whenever I ask...
Your small hands reach out to reassure me
As your lips softly form the words "I am okay".
- RKS
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